Ordinary: My Dark Secret: How I Failed My Family Business
File: #JNAFILES (xvii)
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"The quicker we can learn about ourselves and accept our
truths is the quicker we avoid completely wrecking ourselves." - JNA
Hi,
Almost 160,000 people!
This is the amount of people who on some level find
Or found the things I shared on the Internet interesting.
It's wild to think about, honestly. Any piece of content
I create I genuinely do it with a level of care
Because I want the person consuming it to have a great
Experience & take some kind of value from it!
However, I realized theres a dark secret that
I've had with myself that has kind of held me back
From my full potential of self expression on any level
In any form.
The dark secret: I failed & neglected my family business.
I honestly, failed myself!
I've never said this to anyone or even myself before
But I've always known it, and felt it. Its hard for me
To share things like this because I don't...
a.) love The emotions that come up from this thought
b.) I don't want to dwell. I just am always looking for
Solutions or ways to recover and move forward, and...
C.) Call me crazy, but I genuinely don't believe the
game is over! It's a gift and a curse.
Actually, now that I'm reflecting on this thought, I do
Remember that I shared an article about this once. It
Received a lot of love and appreciation for the share.
Spark Notes version - I Graduated college, went into biz
With my mother. Grew the biz by 40% in the first 2-3 years.
Hit a wall with my mom in the biz. We couldn't see eye to
Eye on some things. My ego took over. I was young. Stupid.
Inexperienced. I used my moms lack Of agreeing with me as
an excuse for my Awful behavior & lack of leadership.
Felt like I was "the man" but it was insecurity.
I had very minimal business success to backup my ego!
It wasn't like I built a sustainable business for 10+
Years or anything. I saw initial growth with the aid of
A consultant and a few mentors.
Anyway, felt like "the man" when I wasn't. I hadn't
Really proven myself to myself yet. I honestly wasn't
Even aware what proving myself to myself even was or meant.
I thought I knew though.
Anyway, I digress....
I Left the family business to go consult other businesses
Around the country. At the same time, Started my content
creation journey, Realized while consulting that my heart
really was for My family business, not consulting other
businesses.
I Feel like I did very well as a consultant. At times
I struggled because I lacked the experience in a couple
Of areas, but all in all I was decent. If I put my mind
Into it and have a sincere passion, I can't lose. Thats
Just my mindset.
If im being really honest, before I left the family '
Business, I would sit there with so many questions. I
Was always looking for answers on how I could make our
Business boom. I kind of saw everything I would get involved
In outside of the family business, as a lead to give me
the answers I was looking for to Grow the family business.
I guess they would call it Shiny object syndrome.
Ive always been a degenerate lol.
I snuck in that I started my content creation journey only
To point out that, as sincere and genuine as I was making
The content, I wouldn't hardly admit that this had all
Being going on in my life. But I knew it. I felt it.
The same feeling I had while consulting, was the same
Feeling I carried when making content.
"My family business is my responsibility because I put
Myself in that position. And I need to do right by my
Parents"
Even though I left the business to pursue other things,
My mindset was always to bring back my experience and
Learnings and apply it to the business.
I would literally tell the universe that I needed more life
Experiences, more hard experiences to be able to
Break through and grow the business where I envisioned it
To be. Be careful what you ask for and how you ask for it.
I said I wanted a bigger challenge, OH THE UNIVERSE
Fucking delivered! Boy did it!
The lessons I took away from 9 years after leaving the
Family business is this:
The grass isn't greener on the other side, ever!
The quicker we can learn about ourselves and accept
Our truths is the quicker we avoid completely wrecking
Ourselves.
Be clear when you tell the universe what you want and make sure
Before you put it our there it really matches the energy you
Want to receive.
I don't have all the answers but ive definitely learned some
Things from these requested experiences lol.
I guess to tie it all together and explain why I even mentioned
The number of people who have tuned into my content across
The web is to say this
Im flattered by the attention. I love the love. I love creating
I love engaging, interacting, and bringing value, but I love
Myself more. I love myself enough to pause, recalibrate, and really
Make things right in my world before I continue the show.
Whats even more is that I haven't given myself any deadlines, timelines,
Rules. Who knows when I'll be back to a place where I just want to create?
I'm just staying true to myself which inevitably makes me a better person
For those around me.
As for the family business, I'm still at it and figuring it out!
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-JNA